An alternative to banning: Miserable Users

This hack is an alternative to banning a user. As the name suggests a user who
gets hit with this hack will become truly miserable while trying to access
your board.

So here is what really happens to a miserable user:

- There is a random 60-120 second delay each time they click on a link.
- 90% of times they have no search engine acccess.
- 75% of the times they get the server too busy error.

If they don't get the server too busy error:
- 50% of the times they may get a blank page
- 30% of the times they may get forwarded to the forum main page
- 20% of the time they may be able to see the page they asked for.

after doing all the math in actuality they have only a 5% chance of seeing the
page they clicked on. What kills them is the time they have to wait before
anything happens.

I actually once tracked a miserable user and watched him suffer for 2 whole
hours before he was able to make a simple post.

This hack is considered one of the most sadistic hacks on my board.

The hack allows you to make your user miserable via the admin CP. It also
allows you to search for all miserable users through the admin CP as well.

Also in showthread.php, it appends a red status that is only visibly to admins
and mods stating that a user is miserable.


Tables affected by this hack: user

Files affected by this hack: global.php, showthread.php, admin/user.php

[Tigga]

Great idea Zzed! There are a few people on my site that I can't really ban because of (for lack of a better term) political reasons. At least with this I can make their lives a little more *miserable* though.

[ITALY!]

wow, great hack
wow

[Vile]

Excellent idea.

Thanks for sharing this great hack

@Zzed:

Would it be possible to make it so Moderators can use this option, or can they already do so?

[Zzed]

Thank you again for all your kind replies. I almost fell off my chair laughing from some of the replies.

-Sidekick-, This hack was inspired by hate.

Vile, Yes there is. I have yet another unpublished hack that allows moderators to ban users.

[Talisman]

Way cool. This will come in handy.

[Ghostsuit]

I'm going to love installing this one

[Areku]

Far Far better than banning!!!

I'll install!!

[Zzed]

Originally posted by maoz440
Sweet hack I now just have to get access to mysql's prompt, my server guys guard it closely Also - is there a way to hide the fact that a user is suffering from this torture from my moderators? I have a couple people I'd like to implement this on without my moderators knowing it (politics ).

Thanks for the hack!

Change this:

PHP Code:

  $onlinestat = "";
  if(($post[miserable] == 1) || ($post[stunned] & 4)){
    if(($bbuserinfo[usergroupid] == 5) or ($bbuserinfo[usergroupid] == 6) or ($bbuserinfo[usergroupid] == 7)) {
      $onlinestat = "$onlinestat<br><font color=\"red\"><b>Miserable User</b></font>";
    }
  } 


To This:

PHP Code:

  $onlinestat = "";
  if(($post[miserable] == 1) || ($post[stunned] & 4)){
    if($bbuserinfo[usergroupid] == 6) {
      $onlinestat = "$onlinestat<br><font color=\"red\"><b>Miserable User</b></font>";
    }
  } 


And it will be visible only to the admins.

[drumsy]

Is there any support to make this 2.2.8 compatible?

[Zzed]

I made this hack back in the 2.2.5 - 2.2.6 days.

You should not have any problems installing for 2.2.8.

Let me know have any problems.