Dear Ann

[Boofo]

Dear Ann Landers,

I am a sailor in the New Zealand Navy.

My parents live in the suburb of Seatoun and one of my sisters, who lives in Palmerston North, is married to an Australian.

My Father and Mother have recently been arrested for growing and selling marijuana, distribution of Cocaine, as well as Heroin.

They are currently dependent on my two sisters, who are prostitutes in Auckland.

I have two brothers, one who is currently serving a non parole life sentence in Mt. Eden Prison, Auckland, for the rape & murder of a teenage boy in 1994, the other currently being held in the Wellington remand center on charges of incest with his three children.

I have recently become engaged to marry a former Thai prostitute who lives in Christchurch and indeed is still a part time "working girl" in a Brothel, however, her time there is limited as she has recently been infected with an STD.

We intend to marry as soon as possible and are currently looking into the possibility of opening our own brothel with my fiancée utilizing her knowledge of the industry working as the Madam.

I am hoping my two sisters would be interested in joining our team. Although I would prefer them not to prostitute themselves, at least it would get them off the streets and hopefully the heroin.

My problem is this: I love my fiancée and look forward to bringing her into the family and of course I want to be totally honest with her.

So, how should I tell her about my brother-in-law being employed by Microsoft?