your member has to apply for your dorm before he will show up in your queue. this is to prevent leaders from roping people into their dorms without their consent :-p
he needs to access the dorm control panel, and find the list of created dorms, and sign up for yours. then you should get a pm, and then he will show up for whatever you plan to do with it.
and the sendpm function posts up the pm to the database just fine. if it isnt appearing then it is probably caused by filtering things, such as being ignored, viewer having admin notifications off, or the pm being sent when the viewer has a full pm box. (thus the 'extra' isnt grabbed when pm listings are queried)
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