Dual quad's and 16gigs of ram. Don't think it's a hardware issue. Might be you need to increase your DB capacity. Take that up with your host. Also check your config.php file for the lingering connection. See how you have it set. I forget what it's called right off hand, sorry. It could be the DB is keeping connected when it should be releasing a connection.
After scoping out your site I found you have an awful lot going on. Lots of custom template work there. And ads everywhere. If all else fails consider doing some streamlining of your forum.
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I have to get back to work.
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