My board's been hit with this recently as well.
Here's the problem - (COPPA) Users Awaiting Moderation can send PMs by default. Some sleazy spammers figured this out and exploited it. I set this option to disallow.
Go to Admin Control Panel / Usergroups / Usergroup Manager / (COPPA) Users Awaiting Moderation / Private Message Permissions
Set the "Maximum Stored Messages" to 0 from the default 50. "If you set this to 0 users from this usergroup will not be able to use private messaging."
Same for "Users Awaiting Email Confirmation".
IMHO this should be default of 0. Hopefully this takes care of our problem.
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