True story.... One of the guys I was stationed with in the UK had ordered a brand new Beemer and had it delivered to the base. He loved that car more than his family and of course, we all ribbed him about it to no end. One week after he took possession of the vehicle, a bicycle ran into the back of him. Put a scratch on his bumper, which he absolutely flipped over. A month later, as the base was preparing for its annual open house, a fork lift ran into it.
We just howled. That Christmas, I drew this guy's name for the gift exchange. So off I went in search of the perfect gift. Didn't take me long, either.
At the Christmas dinner, we all started exchanging gifts. Guy I drew starts to open mine and finds an ornately decorated box which says BMW Repair Kit. What he didn't see at the time was the asterisk on BMW and in very small print at the bottom (Broken Motor Wheels Corporation). He opens the box to find a can of Bondo and black spray paint!