No offense taken.
It's in plain writing what's going on.
If my host told me that I would tell them I am finding a new host and do so.
If that is the expected answer from your host, can you please tell me who they are? So, I can make sure to avoid them. I had a very similar problem with one of my hosts, I asked them what the problem was. That attitude that you say your host is giving is what I was experiencing. I pretty much told them to go 'F' themselves after about a few dozen attempts to resolve the issue. I did my research and switched hosts, no software changes. Haven't had that problem with this one. They either tell me straight up what's up, what to look for, and/or tell me how to fix it... or they fix it themselves.
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