Phrases aren't updating
 

I must be doing something really wrong. I'm trying to do some phrase updates, but it doesn't seem like any of them are taking.

I'm going into the adminCP, searching for phrases, entering the translation (only language is english), and saving them. This should work, correct?

Yes, that should work.

Try disabling your modifications/plugins and see if you still have this problem.
Note: To temporarily disable the plugin system, edit config.php and add this line right under <?php

Don't forget that for vbseo, disabling the modification means to also get rid of anything extra you added to your htaccess file.