This is an AMAZING chat box you made! One feature I love about it, is that it automatically fits to your template color scheme! Superb work!

Yes it does. Has worked ever since I installed it on ~3.7.2 up to the 3.8.5 that I'm running now. I'd suggest removing both product and files from your forum, then doing a clean reinstall. Make sure you follow the instructions to the letter, it's easy to miss something and end up with a product that doesn't work. Another possibility is some customisation on your forums that interferes with the chatbox, either a hack or a different product (try disabling the others, see if the chatbox works then, also try switching to an unmodified default skin just to be sure).

Tbh I can't quite rule out a simple settings problem (for example the wrong usergroup permissions) but it's easier to troubleshoot settings when you're 100% sure you did the installation process exactly as described. Peace of mind thing.
Presumably because no one that has read your post so far, recognises the symptoms you describe. And don't forget that the coder made this available for nothing, he's not under contractual obligation to spend his free time sorting everyone who runs into a speed bump (although it would of course be very nice of him if he did) :)

I know.....I understand...do I need to create a SQL database for it? all the instruction say is to upload the product xml file. I created a database last night but where do I add the info?

You're going about this the wrong way. As with almost all mods it just creates extra tables in your existing vbulletin database. Just looked up the installation instructions, and they're even simpler than I thought:

That's it. No creating databases, no excessive modification of your board required, just import through the admin CP and *possibly* edit additional templates (if you want it to show up in more places than FORUMHOME).
The rest of it is modifying the chatbox settings themselves, but the chatbox hanging at 'loading...' doesn't sound like a settings issue.

Out of curiosity, do you have a lot of plugins installed at your browser? You may want to download a second one (for example google chrome) and keep that devoid of any modifications, a convenient way to find out if it's somehow a problem on your PC.

Yea its what i did over and over but it just keeps hanging on the loading...and no i dont have anything else installed except an automatical usergroup sorter.

here just go to my site and see.... www.bookworm-central.com/forums

Can't see anything, I assume it's not enabled for unregistered users (group 1?). Did you check the other things I mentioned?

Yes I did everything....i reinstalled it why you cant see it now....nottin works its just frustrating...do you have messenger?

Now you can see

Yep. Not sure what to suggest.